Category: Script Writing

First Drafts.

Each script writer went away and began to write their own take on each scene. We all met and developed a finished scene from each others ideas.

Beginning drafts


Characters

Count

Countess

Snow Child

Piano Tuner

Housekeeper

Ex lover of the Count. Slightly crazed.

Scene One


(The curtain opens to reveal a castle’s boudoir, the COUNTESS and HOUSEKEEPER are in the boudoir. The COUNTESS is sat on a chair in the middle of the room.)


HOUSEKEEPER: You look beautiful. You make a wonderful bride. (pause) From here on your life will start. (pause) You’re so lucky if I may say so Madame.


(HOUSEKEEPER carries on brushing COUNTESS’ hair)


COUNTESS: (staring off into the distance. Pause.) Thank you.


(Silence)


HOUSEKEEPER: He will look after you, you know. He has much to give. Wait until you have a tour of the house. It is magnificent. I know you will enjoy living here. The master has put a room aside just for you so you are able to play music till your heart is content. What a good man.


COUNTESS: (happy and surprised) My own music room?


HOUSEKEEPER: Oh yes. He will dote on you as you are beautiful. The master can’t seem to resist your pretty face. (strokes her face and carries on brushing her hair. Pause)


HOUSEKEEPER: Oh you must be so happy. I tell you I wish I could find a suitor like him. Charming, handsome, wealthy, he is every woman’s dream.


(The COUNT enters)


(Silence)


HOUSEKEEPER: Doesn’t she look beautiful.


COUNT: Indeed. (not acknowledging the COUNTESS)


(COUNTESS smiles)


HOUSEKEEPER: You make such a fine pair, if you don’t mind me saying master. This is a day that you will remember for the rest of your lives.


(COUNT smiles and nods)


(Pause. COUNT stares at COUNTESS)


COUNT: Ready?


COUNTESS: (turns to COUNT) Yes…sir


HOUSEKEEPER: Of course she is. All ready for your new life aren’t you dear?


(Silence)


COUNT: (To HOUSEKEEPER) Good. As you were.


(COUNT exits)


HOUSEKEEPER: Nothing to worry about madam. I’m sure your nervous, but today will be wonderful… absolutely wonderful.


COUNTESS: I’m sure it will.


HOUSEKEEPER: There all finished. (COUNTESS looks in mirror) Aren’t you just a picture. Come now. It is time.


(They both exit.)


END SCENE


Scene Two


(The COUNTESS enters on stage. There is a stool at the front of the stage with a spot light on it. She sits and after a few seconds of thinking looks up)


COUNTESS: I was unsure of marrying him as I am so young and he a lot older. But the safety and stability he could provide was overwhelming and what girl would not want that? (Looks at and plays with the huge ring on her finger) Even though he is older then I, he is very handsome. He almost took my breath away the first time I saw him. His dark eyes stared at me and I felt like I was drowning in them. I could feel his lust. He just had something about him and I felt like I was under some kind of spell. He was beautiful. (Pause) He had been married before. More then the once. It bemused me as she had died only 3 months before we met. Maybe he didn’t love her as much as he had previously though as he moved on quickly. (Pause) They never found the body. Poor soul. (Pause) My wedding day was just beautiful. A small affair with only a few people but elegant and luxurious. It felt like a dream… I couldn’t believe it was my day. I was treated like a princess. (Pause) Then it was all over and everyone left. (pause) Then it was just us. Me and him.
(Lights come up to reveal the rest of the stage and a bed. The COUNT is stood at the back and is staring at the COUNTESS. She jumps to her feet and hurries back taking the stool with her and places it somewhere near the bed. The COUNT stares at the COUNTESS for about 10 seconds before speaking)


COUNT: Darling.


COUNTESS: (Hesitates)… Sir.


(The COUNT stares at the COUNTESS and she begins to feel uncomfortable and begins rubbing her arms and looking down)

COUNT: Well look at what I have managed to get for myself.

(He approaches her slowly. She stands rigid. He walks behind her and smells her. Breathes out a huge sigh)

You smell like a pure rose my darling.


(The COUNTESS begins to take a step forward but the COUNT grabs her and pulls her close to his chest as he is still stood behind her. He keeps her here for a few seconds and then he begins to stroke her face and jolts it to the side and begins to kiss her neck. The COUNTESS does not move and remains rigid and scared)


COUNT: (Pushes her forward and she spins around to look at him. He stares at her) What a pretty little doll you are.


COUNTESS: Sir. I…


COUNT: … Sh. I did not say speak! (The COUNT looks angry)


(The count walks over to the COUNTESS and begins to feel her body etc. He stares at her and begins to take off her jacket then top leaving her stood with her arms trying to cover her body with her head down. The COUNT take a step back to admire what is his. He stares for a few seconds then steps forwards to the COUNTESS)


COUNT: (Walks up to COUNTESS strokes her face and strokes her lips) Soon.
(Pause) Come, we will now take a walk.

(The COUNT exits.The COUNTESS is left to quickly put her top and jacket back on and swiftly runs after the COUNT)


End Scene.

Scene Three

(We see the PIANO TUNER attempting to tune a piano in the music room. The HOUSEKEEPER enters the room and looks around and she spots the piano tuner on the floor looking for a tool)


HOUSEKEEPER: Hello.


PIANO TUNER: (The piano tuner stands up. Pause) Hello?


HOUSEKEEPER: Hello dear, I’m the housekeeper (NAME) (She reaches for the piano tuners hand and lifts it from his side to shake it) Just thought I would introduce myself to you. The master said you would be coming. I’m glad you found your way to the room. This castle is rather grand.


PIANO TUNER: Yes, it is. The master showed me up earlier as he wanted the piano fixing for his new bride he said. I’m (NAME) by the way.


HOUSEKEEPER: Yes, he mentioned getting someone over to sort it out. Are you from the village?


PIANO TUNER: I am.


HOUSEKEEPER: I thought as much. The master tries to get all his staff close as they may have family. He is a good man.


PIANO TUNER: Yes, I’m sure he is mam. I lived with my father so hopefully I will be able to see him. (Pause) My father was in the business. He passed it down to me. Unfortunately, I was able to do little when it came to work so he taught me to tune pianos so I was able to make a living. It’s more about feeling the vibrations and hearing the correct notes more then anything.


HOUSEKEEPER: (looks at him sympathetically) I’ve heard you’re nothing but the best dear. Thats why we simply had to have you.


(The PIANO TUNER looks embarrassed)


PIANO TUNER: Thank you, mam. That means a lot. (He smiles to himself. Long pause) Do you have family in the village too?


HOUSEKEEPER: Oh no my dear. I have worked for the master for as long as I can remember.


PIANO TUNER: You must be the best as well then.


HOUSEKEEPER: Well he likes things a certain way and expectations are always met when it comes to me. I always strive to meet perfection and often do if I say so myself. (Long pause) The master took me in at a very young age you see dear and has looked after me ever since. I owe him a lot as he has helped me a lot. I guess he is like my family.


PIANO TUNER: I am sorry mam. I didn’t know that you didn’t have…


HOUSEKEEPER: …Thats perfectly fine, dear. I don’t mind sharing my story. It’s the truth at the end of the day. He’s been good to me and is such a good man. I couldn’t have wished for better (She gives a small smile to herself. Pause) If you don’t mind me asking… How did you lose your sight?


(The PIANO TUNER hesitates but reluctantly talks. He is emotional)


PIANO TUNER: I was like this from birth. My mother had complications and was ill during her pregnancy. When the birth came around unfortunately she did not make it and passed away. I was blind and my father was left to look after me. It was hard for us but we managed.


HOUSEKEEPER: (Pause. Walks up to the PIANO TUNER and takes his hand in her hands) I’m really sorry to hear that. I can’t imagine how hard it would have been. Your father sounds like a strong person and I can see that has reflected on you. You’l be happy here and if not you come and see me.


PIANO TUNER: Thank you.


(The COUNT and COUNTESS arrive home from their walk and enter into the room where the HOUSEKEEPER and PIANO TUNER are)


COUNT: I see you’ve had introductions. Good. (HOUSEKEEPERS NAME) I need you to go and pack for a night away. I have been called to business.


HOUSEKEEPER: Yes, sir. Come (PAINO TUNERS NAME).


(The HOUSEKEEPER and PAINO TUNER exit. The COUNT turns to the COUNTESS)


COUNT: I have been called to go on business. I won’t be gone long but it is a very important trip.


COUNTESS: I don’t understand. We have only just got married and you’re leaving. I thought we were going to…


COUNT: … I won’t be gone long. Only a few days.


(The COUNT pulls out a large set of keys from beneath his jacket and unhooks them from a chain. He puts them into the COUNTESS’ hand)


COUNT: Here. These are keys to all the rooms in the castle. Feel free to go anywhere. This is your house now. Wear as many jewels as you desire and have as many dresses made as possible if you wish. I ask one thing… Do not go down to the west wing. (The pulls one small key from the bunch and shows it her and she stares at it) This key is forbidden. Do not use it.


(The COUNTESS looks at the key then into the COUNTS eyes. She feels scared but curious. She slowly nods her head)


COUNT: Good. (The HOUSEKEEPER enters with his case. He nods at the HOUSEKEEPER and he puts his hand on the COUNTESS’ chin and lifts up her head and gives a long kiss)


COUNT: Ill be a few days. (He exits)


(The HOUSEKEEPER and the COUNTESS are left standing in the room alone)


HOUSEKEEPER: Do not worry my dear. He will be back soon. The master occasionally has to go away on business but its never for too long.


COUNTESS: Thank you. Will you leave me now please?


(The HOUSEKEEPER exits)


(The COUNTESS looks through all the keys like she has never seen them before. She begins to wander around the room and around the castle opening boxes and putting on jewellery. She then finds a box full of letters from the COUNTS ex-wives. She looks through them)


COUNTESS: (Reading the letter out loud) Darling, I can’t wait to be in your arms. Its been such a long time since I felt your touch. You’re the one I want and the one I need. My darling to be with you I am willing to do anything and for fill any fantasy. I crave your skin on mine and will do anything for you. I’m willing to do what we discussed. Till we meet again my darling. All my love.


(The COUNTESS stares at the letter for some time in confusion. She is curious to what the letter is talking about)


COUNTESS: I’m willing to do what we discussed? What did they discuss? I don’t…


(The COUNTESS carries on looking through the box of letters and we see her reading more but she doesn’t say anything. She puts the box back and carries on looking through the rest of the castle. She comes to the key and starts to walk towards the west wing. The HOUSEKEEPER then shouts her name)


HOUSEKEEPER: (COUNTESS’ NAME!)


(The COUNTESS hesitates and turns around and walks away from the west wing off stage)

End Scene

– Written by Hannah Smith

These are all original from the original written script and will be built upon and used for the final master script.

Hannah Smith.

*Appendices “The Liminal Experience”

Liminal

  1. Of or relating to a transitional or initial stage of a process.
  2. Occupying a position at, or on both sides of, a boundary or threshold.

“A kind of liminal experience undergone by audience/participants when engaged In the brief liminality, drama and film. Turner describes these aesthetic forms as representing ‘the reflexivity of the social process, wherein society becomes at once the subject and the direct object” (initiation and disobedience)

“the act of reading a story can become a small initiation, a movement away from old patterns of thinking into new and, ideally, better ones.”

In all of Angela Carter’s tales there are version of “The Bloody Chamber” usually represented through the idea of a room or a space. I think this would be a good concept to adapt in our piece, taking something simple such as  a room full of mirrors and exploring what truly occurs in a space. In most of these spaces there is as a paradox between enlightenment and violence, innocence and experience – which is something we as a theatre company have been exploring in the children vs adult theatre.

Throughout all of Carters stories there is the idea of social change represented through a Gothic and almost timeless tradition. Something that i think lends itself perfectly to our manifesto as a tech heavy, spectacle group. It also is worth noting that to create a spectacle does not necessary mean there needs to be a stage full of props, elaborate lighting plans etc. Less is more when it comes to creating something symbolic of a time, a memory trace or even a simple border between two worlds, theatre vs reality, audience vs actor, young vs old, past vs present …

Many of the stories focus on the idea of liminality, of existing on the threshold between two places or states of being.  This is something we can take, easily adapt, create something totality unique adapted from a small influence of Angela Carter, the threshold can be physically represented if we look back to the idea of the room that all her stories contain. A liminal space.

In literature, liminal spaces traditionally give the occupant both power and torment. At the same time, he or she is condemned never to be fully accepted in either state. What does it mean to separate the fairytale from the real life, why do we aspire for the ‘fairytale’ ending when what we are seeing is something of our own creation?

The two halves of the liminal being’s experience do not seem to make a satisfying whole. Carter explores liminality primarily through half-beings: werewolves, vampires, and the special case of Wolf-Alice, the hyphen in whose name pronounces her liminality most definitively. – Exploring the idea of the half being, why do we use metamorphosis in literature to address issues that we as human beings experience? Is there a truth we are trying to avoid? Why does Carter avoid using human beings in these roles?

Her more radical statement, however, is that all women are forced to live life as a liminal experience. The heroine in “The Tiger’s Bride” realizes this when she considers that men consider women as soulless and incapable as animals.” She is a human who is treated like a beast, and is therefore living as liminal and unfulfilled  life as The Beast – as these themes are recurring in all of her stories, we do not necessarily have to restrict ourselves to three, if we are adapting and (rights restricted) then why not create our own concept of what it is to experience the fairytale, with echoes of traditional stories to make the comparison, creating ANOTHER liminal space not only on stage but between action and audience, what has happened somewhere in between the memory trace of a fairytale and the acceptance of more darker themes on stage and life.

The two worlds – the fairy tale world and the world of touristic experience – share the fact that in the ‘other’ world the hero behaves in a manner which differs from   his or her usual behaviour. Both an act of storytelling that traditionally would take place in a liminal period of time and a journey away from one’s home convey the impression of being on the border of several different worlds.

 

“The transition from the ordinary environment to an extraordinary one is a
typical feature of fairy tales; the protagonist enters an unpredictable world, although
its beginning is familiar for him/her” (Liminality and the imaginary)

Scriptwriting- First ideas.

As a Theatre company we decided to use Angela Carter and her stories to influence our script. We went on to read all her stories from ‘The Bloody Chamber’ novel and came to the conclusion of using three stories as we felt they reflected our theatre company and what we wanted to achieve perfectly. These were; The Bloody Chamber, The Snow Child and The Courtship of Mr Lyon. We were originally going to turn these into individual scripts and perform them on stage linking them together with another story called ‘The Little Matchstick Girl’. This would work by the little matchstick girl coming on between the performances telling parts of her story and ending with her dying. It was then decided by the script writing team, the director and the producer that this would over run the given time limit and we all felt it would not flow as well as originally thought. We then decided to just use ‘The Bloody Chamber’ and ‘The Snow Child’ story, merge them together to make one story and turn this into a script.

Synopsis of ‘Bloody Chamber’

• A young bride travels from Paris through the night with her much older husband towards her new home, a large and isolated castle in Brittany
• She describes her introduction to a world of luxury and pleasure
• Their honeymoon unfolds in the ways she had not expected
• The Marquis leaves to attend to his business affairs, trusting the narrator with the keys to his entire castle
• He asks her to promise not to open the door his private study
• The narrator contacts her mother by telephone, bursting into tears as she speaks of her luxurious surroundings
• Bored and curious, she searches the Marquis office and finds some informatexion about his previous wives.
• She decides to explore the rest of the house
• She opens the door to the forbidden chamber, where she discovers the Marquis collection of the bodily remains of his previous wives on display.
• As the wife dreads the return of the Marquis she is comforted by a blind piano tuner, Jean-Yves.
• The marquis returns and prepares to carry out his murderous plan
• She is rescued from her villainous husband by the timely and heroic arrival of her mother who shoots him dead.
• Now a wealthy widow, the narrator and piano tuner begin a new life together

Synopsis of ‘The Snow Child’

• The count and his wife go riding
• He wishes for a beautiful girl
• The girl appears and the countess is jealous
• The countess destroys the girl
• The count still desires the dead girl and the countess, though she has everything learns that jealousy can be painful.
The symbolic significance of his desires is communicated in the similes of his three wishes: snow, blood and a raven = a mixture of coldness, bloodthirstiness and fatality.

– Written by Stephanie Doe (Director)

We worked of these small synopsis’ to merge the two stories together and create our script. A synopsis of both stories together was then developed which all the scriptwriters would use to begin writing the script.

Original synopsis of whole script

This is obviously going to change it’s just my view as we haven’t managed to have a meeting so hopefully we will have one after lesson tomorrow and sort a few things out and obviously all collaborate together. I think that it’s more about the bloody chamber as the main story then like filtering the snow child in so it makes sense. Also, do we want the necklace in this? I dont think its too important.

Main characters (A few more will be added)

Marquis & Count being combined into one character. (A cold man who enjoys women for sexual pleasure only)

Countess & 17 year old new bride one character. (Naive character but gets stronger in the play and is driven to jealousy. Also in love with the Piano player)

The blind piano tuner (A kind, gentle soul and in love with the countess)

The snow child and The Marquis/Counts true love. (She does not talk/ talks very little. Pure)

I think that we need other characters such as a ‘housekeeper’ or something in the house and she could have something to do with helping the count as when i read the story i got a cold feeling off her but this will all be sorted out as and when we have a rough story etc and we obviously need a few other characters too to help the story make sense and so it doesn’t just focus on this one story. Sub stories are key and a lot of depth need to be added to all characters to make them believable. The hardest thing about script writing is giving your character a back story without actually writing any of it in. It is for the audience to make up in their own head.

The Story from my view- The fairy tales I see running through this is Beauty and the Beast, Snow white and Blue Beard

Scene one
I think we should start with the rough opening to how the bloody chamber starts. Like the whole thing where we learn about how a young girl has married a much older and wealthy man and how he is strange and cold etc and possibly take this through a narrative view. Then we get an opening to the story and a description of the characters. It goes on to the girl arriving in the castle and it being grand and dark (I see the castle in beauty and the beast in my head) and they go to the bedroom. This is when she gets nervous etc as he is quite sexual towards her as it is their honey moon but nothing happens etc. He decides that it is not time for sexual experiences yet and stops all seduction. This is when I think they should go on a ride/ walk (just to get it in the play that it’s a hobby of theirs so they can go for a ride) It could be kind of another fetish thing for him?

Scene Two
The piano tuner can arrive and be back at the house so we can focus on him for a bit and his story. Maybe he could be talking to the housekeeper about how he became blind and I think we should also get some back story of the housekeeper here to do with how long she has waited on the Marquis/Count for and how they may have a bond or something. She could help him preserve the bodies or something like that. When the Marquis/ Count and the girl arrive home thats when he is told about his urgent business and he has to go. The girl is given all the keys to the house and is told to go anywhere she pleases apart from one part of the castle (Beauty and the beast again) and he shows her the key and tells her the room she is unable to go into. The Marquis/ Count goes and she begins to explore the castle.

Scene Three
She has found the music room and plays the piano in it. This is when she can have her first encounter with the piano tuner and they can discuss if he is able to listen to her play when she gives consent. I think this scene should also show the audience that they have a spark and they could do this through the fact that they both love music or something. She begins to go and explore the rest of the castle and finds evidence of his ex wive’s and what they look like and some of the past etc. She however does not go into the chamber as she wants to honour his wishes as she is scared of him but has found a lot of evidence that there is something not right about the count. The piano tuner comes in and they talk once again and she tells him what she has found. They get closer through out the rest of the scenes and begin a secret relationship. When the Marquis/Count comes back he asks to see her in the bedroom and she gives him back the keys and he believes she knows nothing. He checks the key and is happy she did not go into the chamber. This makes her even more curious to what is in it as he has checked. A potential passionate moment here as he is lusting for a woman.

Scene Four
Time has passed and the scene starts with them riding/ walking once again and it is snowing. The Marquis/ Count seems to be mystified with the snow and wishes for a girl made out of snow. They continue riding and come across a girl that is white as snow. I don’t feel the girl just appeared out of no where though I think she has been out all night in the snow or something and has become so white and cold but he sees her as something pure and a thing of beauty. The countess gets jealous as she does not want anyone else to have the count/ marquis due to the wealth he has. The snow girl dies after the countess has demanded her to do many things but before this the countess goes back to the castle. I think the girl should die of the cold not pricking her finger though to make this more realistic don’t know what everyone else thinks? The count/ Marquis then goes looking for the snow girl and finds her dead and the snow is still falling on top of her and he falls in love with her. Then he rapes her but this is a thing of love to him as he has never been in love before. The audience then feels emotion towards his loss but they understand at the same time that is it wrong for him to have sex with this woman. He goes back to the castle and demands the housekeeper to go and find this woman and put her in this chamber and preserve her. The paino tuner and countess meet so she can share with him what happened and she is worried he shall leave her for this beautiful woman. She did not see her die or the rape.

Scene five
The marquis/count has to go on business again and gives the keys to the countess once more. She countess then takes this opportunity to go into the chamber as she has wanted for so long and she finds the dead wives and the dead snow girl. The snow girl looks different to the other two wives. The wives have been left in torture equipment but the snow girl has flowers around her and has been cared for. This is a sign of love. She drops the key in a pool of blood on the floor picks it up quickly and runs. She bumps into the piano tuner on the way and explains all she has seen then it all begins to make sense to each other. They make a plan to escape and run away together but it is too late. The marquis/count is back. He asks for the keys back and sees she has been into the chamber as the blood has dried onto it. He slits the throat of the countess as he fears she has done something to his love and she is then put in the chamber along with his other wives. The piano tuner stays in the castle and lives in the music room where her piano is and pines after her. The count/Marquis preserves his one love for as long as he can and visits her daily and makes love to her. I think the end stage picture should be the countess dead in the torture chamber or something.

– Written by Hannah Smith

We then all decided to begin a script each which would be written scene by scene and have a meeting weekly to put all the scenes together to make one master script to use.

Hannah Smith.

The Bloody Chamber and The Snow Child

We are discussing the possibility of merging two stories together that have already been written as dark fairy tales to give us a platform to begin our script with. The Bloody Chamber and The Snow Child are the favourite stories within the group to use for our story. Due to the lack of characters within the two stories it would require us creating new characters that would be essential to the story and also have intended interaction with the characters already within the story.

After deliberating we came up with the idea that we would adapt The Bloody Chamber to show that there isn’t really any type of ending within reality. So there is no happy ever after and that actions will generally lead to a new story within life. We decided to use the characters; The Count, The Countess, and The Piano Tuner and in put The Snow Child into this story which will then lead on to expanding the story surrounding The Bloody Chamber.

We are intending on producing two new characters that will both be integral to the story and its content. Firstly we are toying with the idea of developing a character that is the all seeing eye within The Counts castle who witnesses all that happens there and all that is said. We are thinking this could be a Housekeeper or Maid type character that will be devoted to serving The Count.

We are also contemplating developing a character that would be an escapee from The Counts chamber who is in the story to warn The Countess of her husbands vile tendencies. This character could be an ex-wife of The Count, who has obviously been affected by what she has seen in her past. The two characters are characters that can be essential to the story but also characters that the actors can work on to make their own and over the coming months can experiment on.

 

Robert Bull

Being a Scriptwriter

As we were wanting to devise our performance ourselves from a known fairytale, we thought it would be necessary to produce our own script so we could put across the message that we were initially intending. Having previously studied the Off the Page module, myself, Hannah Smith and Lewis Chanel decided that we would use the knowledge we had gained on the art of writing and developing a story to create our own, darker look on a children’s fairy tale.

Robert Bull

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